The four Agreements and the “power of Acceptance”
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- antenuptial contract meaning
- June 25, 2026
I have taught the 12 Steps and The Four Agreements to many groups in residential addiction treatment centers, and an issue that often comes up for people in recovery from drugs and alcohol is their resistance to the word “Surrender” as a spiritual practice. For anyone who is trying to create change in their life, “surrender” is one of the hardest things to do. If I surrender how am I going to get anything to change? Our whole lives, we learned that the more control we have, the safer we will be. Every time we were hurt or disappointed, we learned to trust ourselves and others less. We made an agreement to cancel lease to protect ourselves by being more in control of our lives. We learned to believe that if we don’t take care of ourselves, no one will. To many of us, “surrender” means we are giving up our safety, and who would be willing to give that up?
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Television also instructs us that the children of dysfunctional parents will somehow overcome their upbringing. Act III, set in 2011, subverts that premise. Jamie and Rose are all grown up, but deeply damaged in their own separate ways, with the now aged Ken and Sandra willing to let it ride. There are pangs of remorse, but these parents are ultimately more concerned about their own twisted happiness. The entire ensemble turns in strong performances. Actors in time-lapse comedies, they all grow up so fast. We see too little of Mr. Hurt as the absent Henry. He was a fine loser, but serves the play only as a catalyst to spark the other characters into action. Mr. Armitage finds Ken’s inner child and nurtures him into a charming, successful business man who is also a complete failure. The always great Amy Ryan makes Sandra a hot mess, sheathed in an icy exterior.
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